This essay is shared by Remez Sasson
Nowadays the terms self-improvement, self-growth and self-help have become popular. We find many books about these subjects and many websites too. It seems that people are turning inside to find the solution to their problems. They seek knowledge, techniques, workshops, lectures and teachers who can show them the way. People begin to understand that self improvement and self growth improve the quality of life.
The subconscious mind is one of the major keys to self-improvement and self-growth. By changing the contents of the subconscious mind you change your habits, behavior and attitudes. This is brought about by thinking, meditation, visualization and affirmations.
The process of inner change requires inner work. It is not enough to read, you have to practice what you read, and this needs time and effort. There is no such thing as instant self improvement. Any inner change takes time, and there must be motivation, desire, ambition, perseverance and dedication. Outer and inner resistance and opposition must be taken into account too. Upon starting any self improvement program, most people usually encounter inner resistance that come from their old habits and their subconscious mind, and also resistance and opposition from the people around them.
The desire to change, build new habits and improve must be strong enough to resist any laziness, desire to give up and the ridicule or opposition from family, friends or colleagues.
Let me tell you something about myself. I have been drawn to self-improvement techniques from an early age. I have regarded them as a source for inner strength, happiness and a better life. One of the most useful and effective techniques that I have discovered was learning from the way people behaved and acted in various situations. I watched people’s behavior, and looked inside me to see if I behaved in the same way under the same conditions.
When I found some traits of character or certain kind of behavior that I did not like, I examined myself to see if I possessed them too. If I did, I visualized and rehearsed in my mind a different sort of behavior. In my mind’s eye I saw myself with the opposite traits of character. I visualized myself in situations, where I manifested the new behavior.
When I encountered traits of character or behavior that I liked, I used to think about their advantages and benefits and their importance in my life. Here too, I used visualization and affirmations and endeavored to act in this way in daily life.
In this way I have learned and benefited a lot from the behavior and actions of the people around me, at work, at home, in the street and everywhere else, from people in real life, and from watching people on the screen. It was never for the purpose of judging them or taking advantage of them, but for learning how to act, react and behave in a better way. This process had another benefit. It increased the knowledge about how the mind and thoughts influence the behavior and actions of people.
How can you too take advantage of this technique for self improvement and growth?
1. Look around you and watch how people behave in various circumstances. Watch the people you meet at home, work, at the supermarket, on the bus, train and on the street. Watch and learn also from people interviewed on TV, and also from movies.
2. Watch how people talk, walk, and react, and how they are treated by others.
3. Pay attention to the way people use their voice and how they react to others’ voices. Watch how you feel and act when people shout or speak softly. Watch what happens when people get angry, restless and upset and what happens if they are calm and relaxed.
4. If you do not like what you see, analyze what and why you do not like it, and then analyze your own behavior to find out whether you behave in the same way. Be honest and impartial in your analysis.
5. If you find that you possess some traits that you do not like, affirm to yourself frequently that every time this happens you are going to become conscious of this behavior, actions or reactions, and endeavor to avoid behaving in that way.
6. Play in your mind a mental scene of how you would like to behave. Repeat it several times a day, every day.
7. When you detect a sort of behavior or character traits you like and desire to possess, try to act in a similar way. Here too, visualize several times each day a scene, where you act and behave in that different way.
8. You can also decide to change some habit and behavior patterns and develop new ones, because you believe they are necessary and beneficial, even without seeing them in others first.
9. Think and visualize over and over again in your mind how you would like to act and behave. Constantly remind yourself of the changes you desire to make, and strive to act according to them. Each time that you find yourself acting according to your old habit, remember your decision to change and improve, and act accordingly.
10. Do not be disappointed or frustrated if you do not attain fast results. It does not matter how many times you fail or forget to behave as you desired. Persist in your efforts and never give up, and you will begin to see how you and your life improve.
There are many self improvement and self growth techniques, but the one described here is simple, effective and easily performed.