Jun 082004

It’s a hot and sweltering day in London.

I have to pop out early to run an errand for my mother. I try to avoid the heat and walk on the side of the road that has shade. Still no respite. My tee-shirt is already damp. I wish for a lovely breeze. I feel gentle breeze at the back of my neck and around me. Ah, that feels much better! I am cool for a few seconds, then it’s back to feeling sticky again. I keep focusing on the breeze and calling it back to me. The wind always obeys my call. I arrive home and the contrast of heat and coolness indoors results in me instantly covered in sweat. I drink a glass of cold water. I spray on some more deodorant. I have a rest for about half an hour.

I’m out of the house, back in the heat. This time, I’m having a lovely walk. It’s still hot; nothing’s changed there but I’m not bothered, not bothered at all. Everything is a joy. I watch the cars go by. I listen to loud music blaring out of some gaping windows. I smile at fellow pedestrians. What a lovely clear sky. One of the wonderful things about summer are the colours, people in bright coloured clothes. I’m wearing a bright red top designed to resemble the rays of the sun. Yes I’m having a good time. What a beautiful day it is!

It was I, Enocia, who took the walk the first time round and suffered with the heat. I was the same Enocia who walked out in the same heat and had a ball. What changed? My state of consciousness.

The first time I was having a human experience. While I was able to effect the weather through thought I was still being human. A human consciousness means having a physical body where you are able to experience heat, pain, pleasure, weight, passage of time etc. You can be the most powerful human, able to use thought to “move mountains,” yet you are still a human.

“And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.” (St Paul)

The second experience was me having an experience as Spirit. On that walk I remembered that I am Spirit. I experienced myself as having no form, weight or size. I was carrying a rucksack and another bag yet I felt nothing. I was the wind that can appear in one place yet be present somewhere else. Since I didn’t have a form, the heat didn’t bother me because it didn’t register around me. It’s like light and matter. Light slices through matter; they are on totally different “planets.”

The problem is that, like everyone else, I am so used to the human programming of believing I am having a form experience. Thankfully I’m being reminded more and more to know myself as the true identity that I am, Formlessness. It takes practise, a constant reminder to know my nature: to listen to the Inner Silence; to stop doing or changing the world around me; to be mySelf.

Form or Formlessness? No contest.

I am the Formless One.

Enocia Joseph