Unwillingly, due to family attachment, I had to witness my death of 4-5 minutes on 20 August 1977 at the age of about 31 years (Please see my article: Death – a great spiritual teacher, indeed!). It was after revival that I felt it to be a super peaceful state of the self, more comfortable than a mother’s lap, wherein this world vanished like a dream. It may be noted that the sense faculties and the mind were absent during the death experience, so, what could be described about that state of self-being?
What about the idea that I witnessed myself as a sheet of spotless white paper or feeling it as a state beyond all concepts and imaginations, good and bad, pleasure and pain, virtues and vices, duality, etcetera. However, such similes and descriptions can only be a beggar’s description.
We have to get away from the feeling that death separates us physically (and mentally) from our near and dear ones, robs us of our possessions, and makes us leave all our achievements in life behind. Normally we take death as the annihilation of the self, but it is not so when one achieves emancipation during this life (Please see my article: Life making a case for re-birth).
Leaving all this let me tell you why I didn’t willingly embrace my death in 1977. I knew well that I was getting emancipation, but it was the attachment to the children and the financially weak position of the family in which I was leaving them, that kept me back. This was due to my ego feelings, which I had to remove afterwards. I believe that all are born and placed in the proper family on account of the deeds and the level of knowledge achieved in an earlier life. However, we all are part of the same chain and become a medium for each other.
On my revival after the unusual experience of brief death I was so happy that even heaven loses its charm before such happiness. By following the devotion path the ego is removed, because now I am not the doer with the spirit of ego. Everything belongs to Him and as long as I am kept alive I am taking care on His behalf. Everybody has come in this world at his own account and wishes to remain in the world forever (or as long as possible).
Now at the age of 60 let me organize myself to face inevitable physical death which may happen at any moment without prior intimation. In 1977 I happened to know on 16 August about my death on 20 August, i.e., four days in advance, but now it depends on divine will. Anyway, let me prepare myself mentally to organize my feelings at the time of physical death:
- No more enjoyment in worldly affairs when the real soul mate is with me.
- Believing that I am at the service of God, without an element of selfishness, to take care of not only my body and my family but of mankind at large.
- Keeping continuous mental communication with incarnated personal God considering Him not older than 11 years of age; always enjoying His company and thinking of His childhood behaviour with His associates (including me), His sweet name, virtues, and eternal abode.
- Whatever I am doing is for His sake and I am deriving satisfaction in doing so, hence no regret for anything left incomplete at the time of leaving my physical body.
- Let me feel satisfied that my purpose of getting a physical body is over and now it serves to appreciate and enjoy His creation.
One is allowed to add to this list many more kinds of feelings and paint the blank paper received in self-realization with the spectrum of one’s innocent love affair with the soul mate (See: The spectrum of the love of God).
SP Sharma, India