It is quite common to say: ‘Thank you’, without feeling grateful, a number of times during the day. Similarly the word ‘Sorry’ is used without feeling repentant. The real situation is that we avoid the person who is doing us a favour in order not to feel small before him, and it may also be due to the fear that he might demand something unreasonable from us in exchange for the favour.
I was removed from the manager post of a printing press at my hometown, without proof of any fault of mine. This was the job for which I had resigned my government post at a distant place, 2000 km away. This did not make me feel resentful against anybody. Whenever I visited my hometown I tried to pay a visit to the owner because the owner was favourable, but his younger brother who was a partner disliked me and made fun of me whenever he got an opportunity. This fact I came to know through a friend in that press only years later. Instead of resentment, I was questioning in my mind whether honesty and sincerity had any value in this matter or it was just ‘might is right’.
Another event: In 2002 I desired voluntary retirement, which would be five years early, and this was resisted by my family. I was feeling suffocated in the job because I wanted to be completely free for my real mission, i.e., enjoying the company of God and talking about His glory. I wished to become deaf and dumb in worldly matters and for my family to leave me free as if I were dead. I wanted to go in search of other devotees and talk about my Beloved and sing His glory.
It was nearly the end of the year 2005 when I lost my patience and fervently requested God to help me in getting retired from the government job without delay. After two days I received a serious comment from my boss. I was stunned by his remark but the truth is that I was not perfect in my English writing. Moreover, I knew internally that God had heard me and that for this remark my boss had been inspired by God. I stayed one year more on the insistence of my colleagues and was able to retire just seven months early. But this time, for a few months, my worldly mind and spiritual mind were in a horrible inner conflict over my boss. I remained impartial as I knew that my spiritual mind would win over my worldly mind.
Once while traveling on a train a snatcher grabbed my wrist watch and jumped from the slow moving train. In the process I lost my watch, and my finger also pained me for some time, but I requested God to punish the thief for any other sins but not for snatching my watch.
Lord Krishna once pardoned a hunter who had mistaken him for an animal and shot an arrow in the sole of His foot. Jesus too pardoned those who crucified Him and made fun of Him. Hence a God-realized soul only has such a tolerance power based on his supernatural nature. Hence one has to develop one’s godly nature in order to remain with God, otherwise one is bound to remain in the chain of birth and death.
A spiritual mind tries to let the worldly mind subside by vigorous reasoning and by assuring it that nothing will go wrong once you surrender to God. A worldly mind has ego, feelings of I and mine, indulgence in sorrow and happiness, profit and loss, male and female et cetera, i.e., dualism. This duality has to be settled through the intellect and experiences, with the help of scriptures and a spiritual master. Hence we have to feel grateful for our enemies, as well as our supporters.
A real knowledge is that whatever favour, hate, deceit, et cetera are rendered to us, these are due to our past deeds and feelings towards others for certain reasons. Let us accept all this in a normal way because we need to have real knowledge and wisdom gained through the study of scriptures and saints.
SP Sharma, India
I was born on 8 December 1945 and had self-realisation on 20 August 1977 at the age of 32. Thereafter I automatically shifted to the devotion path and a sort of relationship developed with God. Starting as a servant to God, then friendliness with God and then started liking God in child form. There is nothing left except to enjoy divine love and feel its presence in the whole world.